REFLECTIONS ON 2009

Wow! In a twinkling of an eye, 2009 is almost over! How time flies! Although there were days that i wished it would end.....at other times I puzzled at where all the time went......
Since it is the long weekend ( Hari Raya Weekend) , I thought I would take some time to reflect on 2009 and begin to start praying for the direction of 2010.
All in all, I must say that 2009 has been a terribly tough year - battling with depression, loneliness, failures and disappointments. The loneliness seemed to snowballed this year, culminating with many bouts of depression. To add to that, the disappointments with friends, church and cell group just did not make it any better. The very people I needed to turn to in those times just vanished away and didn't even show their care. Maybe I demand to0 much....too much of people and their time..... but the words just kept playing in my mind - People don't care how much you know till they know how much you care..... How true! And for that reason, I just decided to stop going for cell group.....defiant - maybe? But I just could not face people who only cared about themselves and no one else..... I just couldn't.....what is the point of discussing all the Bible verses and not ever putting it to use?!? Hypocrisy if you asked me!
Failures - well, in terms of exams, I have had to take my MRCP part 1 like 3 times before clearing it! But God is faithful - and he enabled me to pass my part 2A at the 1st attempt. I know how bad it would have been for me if I ended up like my friends who had to take part 2A multiple times as well...... so, on one part I had failures, I also had successes....God is good...and He remembers how hard I struggled to study and pass the exams.....
Yet, 2009 isn't all gloom and doom....In it all, I learnt TRUST...and yes, it is TRUST spelt in capital words......in every situation, TRUST just seemed to shine at me......and in the darkest times, that is when God is biggest and strongest and brightest..... it is in those times that He made me recollect all His goodness and blessings....How I prayed at the beginning of 2009 for favour with colleagues and bosses - and that I do have! I prayed for health - and that too He has granted me! So instead of focussing on what I do not have, I can now focus on what He has given me....and to continue hoping and looking forward to what He will give me in the future......
And that is why 2009 is a Year of TRUST - aptly put by Pastor Freddy in church last evening! Indeed , God you know my heart!
So, what is the meditation of my heart for 2010? I want it to be a Year of Joy!!! Why? Because there has been too much tears and disappointments in my life. I want JOY in every circumstance and situation...no matter how bad or difficult it will be....I want His JOY...His unending JOY....His overflowing JOY....for too long I have been wallowing in self pity....it is time to stand up and declare and proclaim JOY into my life....I don't know how it will come into my life and what form it will take.....But I want HIS JOY!!!
So I looked up verses on JOY and this is what I found:

1 Kings 1: 40 - And all the people went up after him, plating flutes and REJOICING greatly, so that the ground shook with the sound.

1 Chronicles 12:40 - There were plentiful supplies of flour, fig cakes, raisin cakes, wine , oil, cattle and sheep, for there was JOY in Israel.

1 Chronicles 15:16 - David told the leaders of the Levites to appoint their brothers as singers to sing JOYFUL songs, accompanied by musical instruments : lyres, harps and cymbals.

1 Chronicles 15:25 - So David and the elders of Israel and the commanders of units of a thousand went to bring up the ark of the covenant of the Lord from the house of Obed- Edom, with REJOICING.

1 Chronicles 16:33- Then the trees of the forest will sing, they will sing for JOY before the Lord, for he comes to judge the earth.

1 Chronicles 29: 9 - The people REJOICED at the willing response of their leaders, for they had given freely and wholeheartedly to the Lord.

1 Chronicles 29:17 - I know, my God, that you test the heart and are pleased with integrity. All these things have I given willingly and with honest intent. And now I have seen with JOY how willingly your people who are here have given to you.

2 Chronicles 20:27 - Then, led by Jehoshaphat, all the men of Judah and Jerusalem returned JOYFULLY to Jerusalem, for the Lord had given them cause to REJOICE over their enemies.

2 Chronicles 30: 26 - There was great JOY in Jerusalem, for since the days of Solomon son of David king of Israel there had been nothing like this in Jerusalem.

Ezra 3: 11,12 - With praise and THANKSGIVING they sang to the Lord: ' He is good, his love to Israel endures forever.' And all the people gave a great shout of PRAISE to the Lord, because the foundation of the house of the Lord was laid. But many older priests and Levites and family heads, who had seen the former temple, wept aloud when they saw the foundation of this temple being laid, while many others shouted for JOY.

Ezra 6:16 - Then the peoples of Israel - the priests, the Levites and the rest of the exiles - celebrated the dedication of the house of God with JOY.

Ezra 6:22 - For seven days they celebrated with JOY the Feast of Unleavened Bread, because the Lord had filled them with JOY by changing the attitude of the king of Assyria, so that he assisted them in the work on the house of God ,the God of Israel.

Nehemiah 8:10 - Nehemiah said: 'Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared, This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the JOY of the Lord is your strength.'

Nehemiah 12:43 - And on that day they offered great sacrifices, REJOICING because God had given them GREAT JOY. The women and children also REJOICED. The sound of REJOICING in Jerusalem could be heard far away.

Esther 8:16 - For the Jews, it was a time of HAPPINESS and JOY, GLADNESS and honor.

Esther 8:17 - In every province and in every city, wherever the edict of the king went, there was JOY and GLADNESS among the Jews, with feasting and celebrating.

Job 8:21 - He will yet fill your mouth with LAUGHTER and your lips with shouts of JOY

Job 33:26 - He prays to God and finds favour with him, he sees God's face and shouts for JOY; he is restored by God to his righteous state.

Psalm 5:11 - But let all who take refuge in you be GLAD; let hem ever sing for JOY. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may REJOICE in you.

Psalm 16:11- You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with JOY in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

Psalm 21:1 - O Lord, the king REJOICES in your strength, How great is his JOY in the victories you give!

Psalm 21:6 - Surely you have granted him eternal blessings and made him GLAD with the JOY of your presence.

Psalm 27:6 - Then my head will be exalted above above the enemies who surround me; at his tabernacle will I sacrifice with shouts of JOY; I will sing and make music to the Lord.

Psalm 30:5 - For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may remain for a night, but REJOICING comes in the morning.

Psalm 32:11 - REJOICE in the Lord and be GLAD, you righteous; sing all your who are upright in heart!

Psalm 35:27 - May those who delight in my vindication shout for JOY and GLADNESS; may they always say, 'The Lord be exalted, who delights in the well - being of his servant.'

Psalm 42:4 - These things I remember as I pour out my soul; how I used to go with the multitude, leading the procession to the house of God, with shouts of JOY and THANKSGIVING among the festive throng

Psalm 43:4 - Then I wil go the altar of God, to God, my JOY and my DELIGHT. I will praise you with the harp, O God, my God.

Psalm 48:2 - It is beautiful in its loftiness, the JOY of the whole earth.

Psalm 51:8 - Let me hear JOY and GLADNESS; let the bones you have crushed REJOICE.

Psalm 51:12 - Restore to me the JOY of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit; to sustain me.

Psalm 67:4 - May the nations be GLAD and sing for JOY, for you rule the peoples justly, and guide the nations of the earth.

Psalm 71:23 - My lips will shout for JOY when I sing praise to you - I, whom you have redeemed.

Psalm 126:5 - Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of JOY.

Psalm 126:6 - He who goes out weeping carrying seeds to sow, will return with songs of JOY, carrying sheaves with him.

Proverbs 14:10 - Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can share its JOY.

Proverbs 15:23 - A man finds JOY in giving an apt reply - and how good is a timely word!

Ecclesiastes 9:7 - Go, eat your food with GLADNESS and drink your wine with a JOYFUL heart, for it is now that God favors what you do.

Isaiah 9:3 - You have enlarged the nation and increased their JOY; they REJOICE before you as people rejoice at the harvest, as men REJOICE when dividing the plunder.

Isaiah 29:19 - Once more the humble will REJOICE in the Lord; the needy will REJOICE in the Holy One of Israel.

Isaiah 35:10 - They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting JOY will crown their heads. GLADNESS and JOY will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away.

Isaiah 51:3 - The Lord will surely comfort Zion and will look with compassion on all her ruins; he will make her deserts like Eden, her wastelands like the garden of the Lord. JOY and GLADNESS will be found in her,THANKSGIVING and the sound of singing.

Isaiah 51:11 - The ransomed of the Lord will return. They will enter Zion with singing; everlasting JOY will crown their heads. GLADNESS and JOY will overtake them, and sorrow and sighing will flee away.

Isaiah 55:12 - You will go out with JOY and be lead forth in peace; the mountains and the hills will burst into song before you and all the trees will clap their hands.

Isaiah 60:15 - Although you have been forsaken and hated, with no one travelling through, I will make you the everlasting pride and the JOY of all generations.

Isaiah 61:3 - And provide for those who grieve in Zion - to bestow on them a crown of beauty, instead of ashes, the oil of GLADNESS, instead of mourning and a garment of PRAISE, instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.

Isaiah 61:7 - Instead of their shame my people will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace they will REJOICE in their inheritance; and so they will inherit a double portion in their land, and everlasting JOY will be theirs.

Jeremiah 15:16 - When your words came, I ate them; they were my JOY and my heart's DELIGHT, for I bear your name, O Lord God Almighty

Jeremiah 31:13 - The maidens will dance and be GLAD, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into GLADNESS I will give them comfort and JOY instead of sorrow.

Habakkuk 3:18 - yet I will REJOICE in the Lord, I will be JOYFUL in God my Saviour.

Zephaniah 3:17 - The Lord you God is with you, he is might to save. He will take great DELIGHT in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will REJOICE over you with singing.

Wow! And those are just from the Old Testament only!!

PSALM 19

The heavens declare the glory of God;
the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
Day after day they pour forth speech;
night after night they display knowledge.
There is no speech or language where their voice is not heard.
Their voice goes out into all the earth,
their words to the end of the world.
In the heavens he has pitched a tent for the sun,
which is like a bridegroom coming forth from his pavilion,
like a champion rejoicing to run his course.
It rises at one end of the heavens and makes its circuit to the other;
nothing is hidden from its heat.

The law of the Lord is PERFECT,
reviving the soul.
The statutes of the Lord are TRUSTWORTHY,
making wise the simple.
The precepts of the Lod are RIGHT,
giving JOY to the heart.
The commands of the Lord are RADIANT,
giving LIGHT to the eyes.
The fear of the Lord is PURE,
enduring FOREVER,
The ordinances of the Lord are SURE,
and altogether RIGHTEOUS.
They are more PRECIOUS than gold,
than much pure gold;
they are SWEETER than honey,
than honey from the comb.
By them your servant is warned;
in keeping them is great reward.

Who can discern his errors?
FORGIVE MY HIDDEN FAULTS.
KEEP YOUR SERVANT ALSO FROM WILLFULL SINS;
MAY THEY NOT RULE OVER ME.Then will I be blameless,
innocent of great transgression.

MAY THE WORDS OF MY MOUTH AND THE MEDITATION OF MY HEART
BE PLEASING IN YOUR SIGHT,
O LORD, MY ROCK AND MY REDEEMER.
Amen! what a heartfelt prayer from the heart of King David! May I too desire that which he desired and prayed for!